Loving the Self-absorbed

Description

A narcissistic partner is forever putting his own needs first. He is also demeaning, manipulative, controlling and competitive. After the early stages of a relationship, the non-narcissist is usually left questioning what's in it for her. In this first book for the intimate partners of narcissists readers are empowered with specific steps they can take to limit the effect of their partner's behaviour, and get what they need out of the relationship. Readers learn the 5 types of destructive narcissism and how to recognize their effects on the relationship. They are assured that they are not helpless, and that they needn't give up on the relationship. Instead, realistic strategies are suggested for learning to set mutually agreed upon behaviours that will fulfill both partners' needs. Readers learn to change "fantasy" expectations, create boundaries, listen and respond in a self-caring manner, and learn when to avoid and ignore especially bad behaviour. Brown teaches them how to stop feeding into a narcissist's self-focus with subtle behavior cues - such as acting distracted when he vies for attention. Ultimately readers will achieve a degree of understanding and separation that will help them see the partner and themselves in a new light.

Nina Brown, Ed.D., is a professor of Counseling at Old Dominion University. An expert on narcissism's effects on relationships, Dr. Brown is the author of ten books, including Children of the Self-Absorbed, Working with the Self-Absorbed, and Whose Life is it Anyway? She lives in Virginia Beach, Virginia.