The Disturbed Girl's Dictionary

Description

A 2019 YALSA Best Fiction for Young Adults Selection A 2018 New York Public Library Best Book for Teens Macy's school officially classifies her as disturbed, but Macy isn't interested in how others define her. She's got more pressing problems: her mom can't move off the couch, her dad's in prison, her brother's been kidnapped by Child Protective Services, and now her best friend isn't speaking to her. Writing in a dictionary format, Macy explains the world in her own terms--complete with gritty characters and outrageous endeavors. With an honesty that's both hilarious and fearsome, slowly Macy reveals why she acts out, why she can't tell her incarcerated father that her mom's cheating on him, and why her best friend needs protection . . . the kind of protection that involves Macy's machete.

Raised in the Boogie Down Bronx, NoNieqa Ramos is an educator and literary activist. She wrote the young adult novel The Disturbed Girl's Dictionary and the picture book Hair Story. She believes Halloween is a lifestyle, not a holiday. If you're in Virginia, you might catch NoNieqa getting motorcycle lessons from her soulmate Michael or going indie bookstore hopping with her preciosos Jandi and Langston. Connect with her works on www.nonieqaramos.com or on the Latinx collective www.lasmusasbooks.com.

According to her school's records, Macy Cashmere is compulsive, learning disabled, and emotionally disturbed. But blunt, opinionated Macy doesn't buy it: 'Who I am is something I do?' she asks. 'Seems to me who I am isn't much about what I do, but a whole lotta things that's already done.' At fourteen, Macy has lived out of her family's car, seen her father jailed, and evaded child protective services after they 'kidnapped' her brother. Nothing in her life is stable, but Macy rolls with punch after punch without apologizing or accepting help; instead, she relies on her cherished best friend, Alma, and her own prodigious wit and reckless resolve. Macy tells her story through electric-voiced, slang-laden entries in her 'dictionary, ' a journal in which she distills her chaotic life into alphabetically arranged vignettes. ('By-the-fucking-way, you're reading this because I'm missing or dead or in a nuthouse, or CPS stole it, and maybe you don't know I'm standing right behind you, motherfoe.') Macy's no-holds-barred retellings of her impulsive adventures around town sit alongside evocative memories of her experiences with hunger, parental neglect, and sexual abuse; this juxtaposition is uncomfortable but adds compelling, empathetic depth to Macy's character. When Alma keeps a dangerous secret from Macy, the already-intense narrative takes an even darker turn, but Macy's aggressive resilience and her irrepressible passion for her loved ones ultimately prevail in this powerful debut.--The Horn Book Magazine -- "Journal" (1/29/2018 12:00:00 AM) Fifteen-year-old Macy Cashmere is emotionally disturbed, at least according to her school, teachers, and family. But her life is heartbreakingly difficult--her father is in prison, her brother was taken away by Child Protective Services, and her mother is involving herself with a string of abusive men who make occasional passes at Macy. She has just two friends: honor student Alma, who hopes that school will save her, and George, who wears a helmet due to an injury sustained after the brutal murder of his sister. Macy's story is told as a series of vignettes, each framed by a word in Macy's 'dictionary' ('Answer. Noun. Example: Ahnsuh me, bitch!'') with a tenuous narrative thread. Debut author Ramos shows Macy navigating the difficulties of school and home while plagued by deaths, threats to her safety, and a constant, nagging hunger. Ramos makes effective use of vernacular to channel Macy's anger, anguish, and sharp-edged perspective in a disturbing but empathetic portrait of life as a child in poverty.--Publishers Weekly -- "Journal" (12/11/2017 12:00:00 AM) Fifteen-year-old Puerto Rican Macy Cashmere keeps a personal journal in dictionary format which gives readers insight into the mind of a teen disappointed by her urban environment and most of the adults in her life. Labeled 'disturbed' by the school system, she lives in constant hunger, sleeping in the bathtub to avoid uncomfortable events in the rest of her apartment. She clings to her relationship with her 'bestie, ' a beautiful, intelligent young Latina going through her own family traumas, together with their friend George, who, despite his own challenges, serves as a stabilizing force. Teacher Mrs. Black is the singular adult who seems to provide deep acceptance, caring, and timely words of encouragement. Intra-textual references between dictionary entries provide clues about past and future events until they meet in real time at the plot's climax. This complex story of love and loss can lead to insightful discussions about the problematic label of 'disturbed.' The book concludes with some hope but not a complete resolution which makes it realistic in a lingering way. While this text includes strong language, the use of inventive spelling to defy school grammar, and content suitable for older readers, it may provide students with similar life experiences from an identifiable protagonist and serve as a catalyst for critical educator-facilitated discussions. VERDICT Purchase where Isabel Quintero's Gabi, a Girl in Pieces is popular.--School Library Journal -- "Journal" (11/21/2017 12:00:00 AM) Macy Cashmere's one-of-a-kind, no-holds-barred teen memoir will blow your mind and break your heart. Her unforgettable voice is hard-hitting and unflinching, compassionate and streetwise, delivered with a linguistic and structural playfulness that both dazzles the reader and draws them in deep. With The Disturbed Girl's Dictionary, NoNieqa Ramos establishes herself as a literary star on the rise.--David Bowles, author of Chupacabra Vengeance and the Garza Twins series -- "Other Print" (5/17/2017 12:00:00 AM) Macy's blunt story is a harrowing, heartbreaking tour de force. NoNieqa Ramos's The Disturbed Girl's Dictionary turns the spotlight on Macy Cashmere, a high school girl who lives in the margins of society. Noncompliant and proudly emotionally disturbed, she's a problem that refuses to be solved, whether at home or at school. Poverty's where Macy is from, and she's acutely aware of how it shapes and labels her, but she's determined to reconfigure who's defined by such labels and who's doing the defining. You see, Macy's writing her own book--a secret dictionary that lays out the terms of the world as she understands them. Macy's childhood is long past. Her father is in prison. Home is chaotic, and basic necessities--from food to heat to a place to sleep--are never assured. Child Protective Services removed her younger brother and would like to take Macy too, but Macy stubbornly insists on remaining, stuck between her yearning to salvage some sense of home and her desire to burn it all down. Her life swings between this tension and her school routine. A problem student, Macy is nonetheless deeply engaged--in the well-being of her best friends, Alma and George; in the comforting control of breaking school rules and fulfilling her 'bad kid' role; and in all that she ponders deeply. Macy's charisma is riveting. A keen observer, she's unsparing in her assessment of herself and the world around her. Her blunt, no-nonsense voice lays out her most gruesome circumstances alongside her bald yearning and makes her world of pain compellingly irresistible. More than anything, she is an unexpected narrator. Again and again, she directly addresses readers and slaps down assumptions. A study in contradictions, she insists on her world's complexity, and she's right. The story jukes and jinks and demands you follow. As in Macy's world, nothing in this dictionary is blunted or made safe for children; the circumstances of her life are laid bare. The result is a harrowing, heartbreaking tour de force, a story of will and determination against all odds.--starred, Foreword Reviews -- "Website" (1/1/2018 12:00:00 AM) Nonieqa Ramos's The Disturbed Girl's Dictionary comes at a relevant time and with a powerful and endearing cast. Macy's story is necessary and unique, and both she and NoNi present voice and narrative unlike anything we've seen before.--Amy Zhang, author of This is Where the World Ends -- "Other Print" (9/20/2017 12:00:00 AM) Officially classified as 'disturbed, ' Macy vents her rage, frustrations, and fears in a dictionary-style journal. According to her high school, 15-year-old Macy (who's of Puerto Rican descent) is ADHD, compulsive, learning disabled, and emotionally disturbed. Thanks to her caring English teacher, Miss Black, Macy keeps a detailed, secret 'dictionary' in which she shares words and definitions relating to her life, from 'always/never' to 'zombie.' Macy's family life is unimaginably difficult: she goes hungry outside of school, Daddy's in prison, Mami sleeps with abusive men (who creepily come on to Macy as well), and baby brother Zane was recently 'kidnapped by CPS' to a foster home. Macy is also aggressive, angry, and intimidating. Despite her circumstances, Macy has two unconditional friends: her patient bestie, Alma, who hopes to earn a college scholarship, and George, a loyal, nearly mute trauma survivor who always wears a helmet. Macy's grittily honest accounts can be hard to process and the stylized language, off-putting (as when she substitutes 'f' for 'th' in 'breaf, ' 'Birfday, ' 'baftub'), but her voice is inimitably unique in contemporary teen literature. The heartbreaking events are almost unbearable, but the author depicts them with authenticity and empathy--even when Macy wields a machete to fix a problem. Ramos' relevant and thought-provoking debut is a powerful addition to any collection.--Kirkus Reviews -- "Journal" (10/30/2017 12:00:00 AM) The events that led to Macy Cashmere's stay in a mental institution unfold through mostly alphabetically-arranged 'dictionary' entries that piece together a harrowing and ultimately empowering story of survival. Macy's dad is in prison, her mother flits from one so-called 'boyfriend' to another, and her little brother Zane is in foster care after Child Protective Services was tipped off by neighbors. But Macy's primary concern is that her best friend Alma is uncharacteristically withdrawn. Ramos presents the raw, real voice of a fiercely protective and determined young woman who eventually takes up her grandmother's machete to protect herself and her friend, an act that lands her in the institution. Like Sapphire's Push (1996), it's almost too much at times--or would be if it weren't so believable. The dictionary format and nonlinear exposition work beautifully to slowly reveal the reasons for Macy's actions, while her wry humor and sharp tongue leaven the first person narrative. An ambiguous but realistic conclusion will provoke discussion. Ramos is a voice to watch; her exceptional writing and compassionate realism will draw many readers, not just fans of urban fiction.--starred, Booklist -- "Journal" (10/17/2017 12:00:00 AM) These pages vibrate with Macy's fury, beat with her enormous heart, and take flight. I wanted to burn down the whole damn world and build a new one worthy of her. Instead, I started the book over to witness again the alchemy that turns brokenness into a thing of beauty. Unforgettable.--Ashley Hope Perez, author of Printz Honoree Out of Darkness and The Knife and the Butterfly -- "Other Print" (10/1/2017 12:00:00 AM) 5Q 4P S Macy Cashmere may not be in the AP classes like her best friend Alma and the school may label her 'disturbed, ' but that does not mean she has nothing to say. Her unusual dictionary reveals a strong-willed, big-hearted teen with plenty on her plate. Her dad is in prison and her mom's strategy for managing the household mostly consists of finding 'guests' to provide financial support--support Macy refuses to accept in any way. Her brother is in foster care, and though the specific reason for that is not revealed until later in the book, it comes as no surprise. Finally, there is Alma, who seems be distancing herself from Macy, though Macy has no idea why. Ramos's stunning, gritty debut is equal parts hilarity, heartbreak, and hope. Macy's distinctive and authentic voice engages readers immediately. The unusual format of individual entries in (mostly) alphabetical order works well to reveal Macy's story and character a little at a time. Her poignant entry, 'Pink, ' about the somewhat stereotypical English teacher who sees through Macy's mask, is an elegant tribute to passionate teachers everywhere. Although tragedy fills the pages as Macy's world slowly spirals out of control, this is ultimately a triumphant narrative of one teen taking charge her life and determining her own story.--starred, VOYA -- "Journal" (3/26/2018 12:00:00 AM)